Life Lessons From Honey Boo Boo

While my hubs was watching the ever stimulating presidential debate - I decided to occupy my time with something a little more educational

And by educational, I mean brain numbingly stupid

To which you are all saying, "Oh she must be speaking of Honey Boo Boo" - to which I would say...

"You better redneckognize!"
{yes, I skipped the debate  - it was the season finale - sue me}

For those who choose not to educate themselves on the earth shattering words of wisdom from the mouth of sweet little Alaina - let me help you...

{1.} "You have to eat a lot of gravy and rice if you want to be a supermodel." 
Apparently eating gobs of starch and sodium help melt those pounds away. Keep eating honey!

{2.} "I wish I had an extra finger, that way I could grab more cheeseballs."
*side note - her sister's new baby has two thumbs on one hand
I smell another talent for them pageants!
P.S. - Was anyone else's first thought not about cheeseball eating ability? Maybe more along the lines of why didn't they have the extra thumb REMOVED?

{3.} "Baby Kaitlyn is so tiny - I poop bigger."
That's momma's little sunshine right there! Probably because of all those cheeseballs - yuck

{4.} "Ain't nothing wrong with being a little gay - everyone's a little gay."

Glad to know you are embracing the LBGT community girlfriend.

{5.} "Baby Kaitlyn came on the biscuit express."
For those who do not speak white trash - a "biscuit" is slang for your whoha...hmm thanks for ruining the thought of ever eating another biscuit again for me Boo Boo


Don't even get me started on the things that the rest of her inbred family says - they say a picture is worth a thousand words right?

Dear God, the site of June's 43rd chin just does me in
P.S. – June bug {Honey Boo Boo’s momma) is only in her early 30s…rock it girl, rock it!

I hope I look that damn awesome when I become a mother of 4 sgetti eating, baby making, pageant participating, gnat slapping, mud-bogging, breath smellin’ cuties!
All I am saying is if she can get a man {or at least one perchild} than there is hope for anyone!

- Lindsey Nicole

1 comment:

Darby Hawley said...

Oh my goodness! I don't even know how to repond L-O-L!